I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Randomize
