you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
We got so high we made milksteak
two words: eviction party
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
