Tell her she can't have a vagina
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Randomize
