Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
ugly people sure do ruin things
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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