We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
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