I could have mohawked her pubes.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
