Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Randomize
