I've blown a few things in my day
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
