Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Randomize
