I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
she woke up with a sticky ear
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
