i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Randomize
