plz talk dirty to me
Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Randomize
