Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Randomize
