Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
