I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
