Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Threesome in a minivan. New low
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
