we were pretty classy up until the second keg
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
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