Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
why do cheetos always look like penises
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize
