My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Randomize
