Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Randomize
