I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
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