My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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