I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
