vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
Randomize
