Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
