Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Randomize
