I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Randomize
