Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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