I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize
