Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
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