Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
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