mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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