I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Randomize
