we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
