is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
