good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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