Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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