I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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