Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Randomize
