She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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