the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
