Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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