its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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