New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
my being single is dangerous.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
