There was a lot of him and a little penis
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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