And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
