:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Randomize
