He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
