i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
