she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
